April | 2017 | haliewanders

On the eve of my 24th birthday (mid-twenties, y’all), I sit cuddling Elsa on my bed. It was a loooonnnnnggggg day at school, and my brain is trying to process a million-and-one things, while laughing at “Jane the Virgin,” and worrying about things I shouldn’t worry about.

And then I realized I’ve learned a whole lot these last 24 years, from people way smarter -and way less smart, in some cases – than me. I figured I should create a list. Maybe next year I’ll have even more to add. But where do you start whilst chronicling knowledge acquisition from…well…all the way back? Probably with Mom. She is, after all, where birthdays started, eh?

Mom always has your back. Even when she is *sometimes* over-the-top with worrying, stressing, analyzing, she is always looking out for YOU. Mama Bear is REAL, and I pity the person who brings it out in her…or causes her to threaten a “strongly-worded letter.” She brought me into this world 24 years ago, and I’m pretty positive she could take just about anyone out of it.
Wear sunscreen, and lots of it.
Just because you get paid, doesn’t mean you deserve gifts and presents and make-up. IN FACT, “treat-yo-self” doesn’t mean “treat-yo-self-all-the-time.”
Wake up in the morning, hit the snooze button only twice, and then GET YOUR A$$ UP. More snoozes than two and you’re DOOMED all day.
Forgive as easily and as freely as you sometimes dole out grudges. Out of all my “learns,” this realization is one that keeps on cropping up. Much to my disdain.
Cat cuddles are the best cuddles.
Laundry is the worst thing, but I’m incredibly grateful for the spin cycle and a dryer.
Don’t add a red shirt to whites, though. Or you get too much pink. Duh.
Oven mitts were invented to prevent burns. If you forget to put one on, you’ll get burned. Please wear oven mitts.
Sisters are sassy and bossy and hateful. BUT. You love them more every single year. So, Meredith and Amanda, I love you 24x as much as I did when you each were born. Every year, I love you each more and more and more (despite the *occasional* attitudes and terrible picture posts).
Some people just DON’T LOOK GOOD in mom shorts. I’m one of those people.
Some people just DON’T LOOK GOOD with bangs. I’m one of those people.
Don’t mix alcohol. Stick with one. ALSO, don’t mix alcohol with emotions. You’ll end up crying into a brick wall, muttering incomprehensible lists of regrets and fears to your roommates.
Go on a hike. Take panorama pictures of scenery that never looks as astonishing as it did in the moment. Don’t apologize for doing it.
Say you’re sorry. Just not all the time. Only when you’ve actually done something you shouldn’t have (i.e. not because you accidentally opened the door at the same time as someone else).
When someone (student/friend/family) get’s mean, get kind. You’ll always look back at the end of the day and regret lashing out for no reason.
Make people earn your trust, but don’t build walls too high.
Coffee. Need I say more?
Taylor Swift on full blast is ALWAYS a good idea.
Accept gifts, words and deeds and items, from people that love you. Remember that you love to give, as do others. Don’t feel guilty, but never take those gifts and people for granted. (Even when friends do BIG things that seem like a lot. Remember how BIG you love them, and then try to accept their gifts, and move on).
Take pride in your cool qualities. Everyone has some. I really like that I make friends everywhere I go. I’m learning to accept the fact that I don’t have to be best friends with everyone, but I’m also hoping to never lose that “talent.”
Not everyone has the same impeccable sense of direction you’ve been blessed with. Draw maps. Drop pins. Use descriptive directions. Landmarks help.
Anxiety is something easily remembered when you feel your heart flutter. But remember you have people around you to help shoulder the burden of fear. Text him or her. Breathe. You’re not supposed to be carefree all the time. Find a balance.
Remember that courage is all perspective-based. When Harper Lee said that she “wanted you to see what real courage looked like instead of getting the idea that courage was a man with a gun in his hand,” she hoped you would recognize that courage doesn’t eliminate the possibility of heartache, but minimizes the magnitude of the seismic shifts that life inevitably brings. It means loving people regardless of the hurt you remember, remembering those people after they are gone, and continuing to learn and grow, even amidst changes that were bound to come anyway. Lean on the people around you. Learn. Love. Serve. Love.