Okay, I admit it. That title might be just a tiny bit mean and unpleasant. But after you hear what I dealt with on my first day back to work a couple weeks ago, you’ll understand what I mean. The phone conversation I was subjected to goes something like this:
Me: “Thank you for calling, this is Halie. How may I help you?”
Woman: “Hello, Halie. My son “so and so” is moving in on August 22nd, and we were hoping you might be willing to help us out.”
Me: “Well, ma’am, I sure hope I can! What can I do for you?”
Woman: “Well, you see, my son is in a two bedroom apartment in the fall, and he really only had one request when we signed the lease. He really did not want a foreign roommate. You see, he has a foreign roommate once before, and it was a nightmare. And his new roommate has the last name “****” and well, quite frankly, I cannot even pronounce the first name. So can you please find a way to get him a new roommate.”
Me: (After an appropriate moment of shock and silence)…” Well, ma’am. I am very sorry you are frustrated, but I can absolutely do nothing to help you. You see, we have these laws called “Fair Housing Laws.” They basically say I cannot match roommates based on racial requests. Actually, I could lose my job and go to jail. So no, I cannot help you, and my managers will also be unable to assist you in this matter.”
Woman: “Oh okay, I understand. I just feel so very sorry for my son. He is an athlete and feels very strongly about his request. I guess I will tell him to try his best to get along with the roommate, though I cannot imagine that will happen. Thank you for, well, not helping.”
I would like to state, for the record, that I was IMMENSELY patient and understanding. In my mind, however, I was anything but patient and understanding. I really love my job, and I did not want to get fired. However, it took every ounce of self-control to not tell the woman exactly what I thought, which is this:
In an age where global politics, economics, and humanitarianism dominates the social sphere, how is it ever “okay” to make an assumption about a person’s character based on how their last name is spelled? Believe me, when people read my last name, they may assume I come from Eastern Europe, though my family hasn’t lived in Poland for three generations. My friend’s last name is “Lang” though that hardly makes him “Asian.” Because I work in the housing industry in a college town, I constantly hear people discuss the number of international students in the area, and whether or not their presence is a detriment to society.
Here’s the answer: NO. International students and visitors are imperative to society.
What I want to emphasize is the importance of such students. International students increase diversity on a campus or in a community. They bring cultural understanding, and in many cases, lead to discussions that promote positive change in terms of acceptance and global influence. When different cultures intertwine, the end result is compassion and common humanity. My good friend from Northern Ireland enriched my life while I attended Queens. She explained the political and religious history of Northern Ireland, and answered my questions about the current climate in her country. It was an amazing cultural exchange, and we are still friends to this day.
The alternative to cultural understanding, of course, is racism and stereotyping. These social stigmas lead to problems that reach across centuries, time zones, and country boundaries. Fear has a remarkable way of rearing its ugly head. People fear what they find unfamiliar. It is my belief, however, that unfamiliar territory is often the most exciting and rewarding to explore. Knowledge is the greatest weapon in our arsenal. Hatred and condescension, like that woman displayed, lead to so many unwelcome issues.
Consider, for a moment, the current conflict in Israel and Palestine. For the past few weeks, my Facebook page has been filled with “Pray for Palestine” or “Pray for Israel” pictures. While I believe prayer for both locations is necessary, I cannot help but think that the location itself is irrelevant. Yes, you heard me. It matters not who you believe is “correct” or “justified” in these terrible attacks, but rather what type of thoughts you believe cause these attacks in the first place.
Religious conflict goes hand in hand with political conflict. It has been this way since the dawn of time. What both types of conflict have in common, however, is the idea that one side is RIGHT. One side knows everything about everything, and anyone who doesn’t share the same knowledge is someone who must be eliminated. Not silenced, not persuaded against their belief, but completely eliminated from existence. Fear drives hatred, and hatred drives violence.
That woman was not violent. She did not attack me. Her thoughts and words, however, hit me like a physical blow. I could not breathe.
Tanzania was truly life-altering for many reasons (more than I could ever say on a blog), and I wish others could witness the love and kindness shown to me by “foreigners” and people of international origin.
A roommate can be unpleasant no matter where he or she is from. It all comes down to the values and ideas of respect the roommate was instilled with while growing up. In any case, this “son” may be in for the surprise of his life – he might become friends with a foreign student. (Insert sarcastic sigh here).
In other news, I am beyond flattered by the positive feedback I’ve received in regards to this blog and the columns I wrote for the Parthenon. (I hope this rant-like-post has not turned anyone off to my writing). I hope to occasionally update my blog. I feel no need to make this blog into a time capsule – life’s journeys are all around us. You do not have to fly thousands of miles to have something to say.
Lala salama.
haliewanders 